I thought I think too much

Let me tell you this in advance.. the title above is from Lenny Kravitz's song, "It ain't over till it's over". And I'm going to tell you this in advance, when I die, please put that song on. Cos baby..it ain't over till it's over. Do anything to my body when I die... I don't care. Like an old broken down car, i'm the driver..and that piece of junk...well...u can just leave it there to rot, I don't care. Or burn it. Decapitate it. I really don't care what you do to me after I die. I'm far away and gone. I am probably floating around, waiting to live again, or just hanging around you...watching you as you sleep...and shower...and eat...................... BOO!!! HA! I dont really know where I'm going with this blog post. I'm not making fun of death or anything. Who in their right mind would ever make fun of death? I do sometimes though...to be honest. I try to look at it lightly, to get to know death. I'm weird that way.

I've seen way too much to be stuck in a mind that's filled with uncontrollable fears. The truth of the matter is, nothing is really controllable. Nothing is ever for certain. I've always been those that believes in my own capability. Like..fuck you, i'll be great on my own. But people change, things happen, happiness comes & goes. Truth is, and this is hard for me to even admit I was wrong...but i was wrong. Life is too big to be shared only with yourself . I'm not saying everyone needs to fall in love. You don't need a certain someone to be happy, cos happiness is a perception . Perception comes from no one else but your own mind. When I was little, people would ask me what I wanted to be. I never said I wanted to have money or be successful. I wanted to change perceptions. I wanted to change the way people look at life. So this is not a blog post. This is a reminder for myself. I swear I'll change your world. In some way we haven't found yet, but

This blogpost is a combination between my idealistic views and the hope of tomorrow. It's about the things I'll tell my kids. 1. Believe that whatever u have,there's always someone that has better things than you..but most of all,there's always someone out there than has none of the things that makes you happy . 2. Believe in whatever God or god or even gods you want..believe in anything that brings peace into your life.. I dont care about what you call your God,I only care that you believe in your God and that He or She will push you towards goodness . 3. Believe in your senses ,even if no one can feel or see or taste or hear what you sense. 4. Believe that every sense you choose comes with a consequence. Your parents might not find out,but karma is more than a spank in the butt . 5. Believe in karma. Believe hard that whatever you do comes back around, so make sure all you push out there is good things . I dont need you to fear hell or to dream about heaven.. karma is

Let me start this off with me saying. If I dont spend at least a day in a week talking to u, this post isnt for u. That simple..gue bukan tipe orang yng suka koleksi temen.. what for? networking? u dont have to be friends to network...berarti ada maunya dong kalo temenan? Well maybe different person different perspective. thats MY perspective on friendship..maybe..just maybe,one day i'll look back and have a totally different perspective than now..who knows? I dont make friends with predictable person. Thats another reason why I don't "read" my closest friends. I want to spend time with people thats full of surprises, with turns, ups and downs. I like aliens. People who spend time trying to be a part of society but gave up & just live their life the way they want to. People who stand up for themselves instead of conforming to everything around. I love those people. I like people with brains too..and those that uses them. Tuhan tau lah seberapa banyak dosa yng gue

I guess this post is only for those who has known me for the past 4-ish years. I know u've seen me change..a lot..maybe some would think too much. I was probably the biggest ball of ass anyone can ever stand to have called "a friend". (*to those that still thinks i'm an ass..thank you) I'm proud of that though.I'm proud of every single soul I got in a fight with. Every.Single.Soul. But the war I've won with myself is one I'll never stop being proud of. Maybe...just MAYBE ...one day I'll look back,when I'm gray and old..wishing I was a nicer person..but I can guarantee,I won't ever look back to the fights I had with my soul,the tears I shared with the gloomy corner of my life. I want to share something... Gue..dari sekian banyak manusia di bumi...bukan salah satu dari mereka yng sabar. I like to pick fights with people..I like to shove my head up your ass and make others uncomfortable. I like the sensation of being a big ball of intelligence